Contradictions

I come back to the same idea over and over again: spiritual manipulation.

I've never really believed that I had any power to manipulate God. Of course I cannot affect an outcome by thinking the right things, or approaching a problem with the right attitude. I cannot manipulate God into doing things in a way that will be pleasant to me just because I've done or said the right things.

For example, I cannot say to God, "I trust You with this thing," and then feel guaranteed that what I hope will come true.

However I've somehow believed that the equal and opposite possibility is true.

For example, I've somehow believed that if I tell God that I trust him with a certain thing that He is then obligated to test me in that faith. I've thought that if I say I trust God that those things that happened to Job will then happen to me.

But if I cannot manipulate God into doing things my way, I cannot manipulate him into testing me either...