Marla Cilley of Flylady.com says it takes 28 days to establish a habit. Though I've been reading her thoughts on the matter for years, I have never quite believed her. How many times over the years have I done the exact same thing day after day, for a month or two (and sometimes more) only magically one day to stop: Scripture reading, taking a 30 minute walk before dinner, posting notes to my blog, taking a shower before bed, straightening the house for the morning, rocking Isaac in the living room following his first feeding of the day, taking a multi-vitamin after brushing my teeth? Even after much repetition, not one of these things has formed a solid habit. I was relieved then to read the other day on
webmdhealth that "
most of us go through relapse seven times before we change our behavior." This makes sense to me, as does the notion that habit formation takes commitment. You have to be willing to work through the relapse, and guilt hinders your ability to do so.
I would be interested, if anyone were willing to share, in reading about victories or failures you've experienced in this area of habit formation. Any time I ask about such personal details, however, I am reminded of a script I heard months ago on "A Prairie Home Companion."
I'm a private eye. A proud profession that died a long time ago, kid. Back in the Age of Privacy, you had to work to find out stuff about people, follow them around, sneak up behind trees, plant microphones in cocktails. Now you can find it all out on Facebook.
4 comments:
Try forming a bad habit. They are much easier.
Easier, I suppose, because they don't require the use of willpower. I read somewhere recently that we only have access to limited stores of willpower on a daily basis, so if we exercise it in one area, we are then unable to exercise it in another. They said too that like a muscle, willpower can be built up with use.
I have more failures than victories in this area. I think I'm one of those who doesn't push through the relapse because of the guilt.
Some find that passion over desire is much more rewarding in cases such as these. In other words, if it something that you are passionate about, you will go in head first and without question. On the other side of that coin, if it something that you desire (emotion) you would like very much to form a new 'habit'...burn your desire into passion and there will be no stopping you!
Example: Many have a hobby that they enjoy and have 'thought' about doing said hobby more regularly- others have a hobby that they are passionate about and have made it a habit, a focus if you will, to do these things daily.
Much like we have a hunger for the Word. And when we relapse from our time with Him, we don't necessarily guilt but, become hungry again. Then going back to our routine. Having a passion for Him, we seek Him daily.
Off topic?
Love to all,
Pam
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