The One Thing I Lack; Or rather, the one thing I lacking seek of the moment

I picked up a book yesterday to consider whether or not it was a good time to start reading it. The book is Climbing Parnassus: A New Apologia for Greek and Latin. This was a book provided for us at the Classical Conversations Practicum several weeks ago. I started with the foreword, written by someone who saw fit to add his endorsement to a text he had reviewed, and read these words:

I was attracted immediately by the lucidity of his writing style and by the generosity of his mind.

I would very much like to know how I might obtain a generous mind, for I fear I do not possess one. Maybe if I read Climbing Parnassus someday, I may find out what the preface writer meant when he said that Tracy Lee Simmons has a generous mind .

An Incident. A filler? Good times with my son.

When my three year old woke up this morning, I was sitting in the living room reading a book, several of them, a pencil, and my coffee, piled up beside me. He came and nestled in next to me, then grabbed my Bible and started reading out the numbers of the chapters in Genesis. This time he recognized every one of the twenties, something we had gone over a week or two ago, but had not revisited since.

Amazing.

He had trouble once we entered the thirties, but in a little more than a week he has gained an entire section of numbers he didn't know before. The three-year-old mind is a fantastical thing.

And how do you like those sentence structures? I've been reading Stanley Fish, How to Read a Sentence. I suppose I've absorbed a little something in the past week myself, as difficult as that week had been. Whether they are good or not, or anything different from what I was accustomed to do already, I cannot tell.

Another Tune for Friday

My boys started watching Phineas and Ferb last night. They had seen it before at my sister's house. We had Phineas and Ferb gummies earlier in the week, so it was on their minds. They're watching an episode right now that reminds me of this song from The Jetson's, recorded by the Violent Femmes:



 And to think, we were at the table discussing our childhood cartoon viewing habits only yesterday.

A Sombre Song for a Gray Friday

I just learned something. I didn't realize before that I could share Levi Weaver's music directly from his website. So that's pretty cool. I don't have to go through grooveshark anymore, at least not when it comes to Levi.



It's just that kind of day today. I kinda want to hide away, but I can't. There are things to do, people to see. Old saw. Yesterday I got really stressed for a time and did some wallowing. Today I'll probably do some hiding. Tomorrow will be a better day.

Having to Work When I'd Rather Be Reading

I've had a hard time keeping up with the household this week. Laundry, the one thing I think I'm really good about, has piled up. Letting the laundry get behind adds up to too many loads to fold on the same day. Often this means that one load gets left in the dryer to wrinkle for a day or two. We don't even generate that much laundry at this point. I don't know how you ladies manage who have to do three loads every day. Hopefully you've figured out how to get your kids to help. I haven't managed that one yet.

Okay, so here's my thing for today: I've told you how I'm supposed to have a few hours free in the mornings to get some work done, that's reading, studying, writing, bookkeeping, editing, etc. I'm glad to have it. But it turns out that I can't use that time any old way I want.

For some reason, if I don't start in on the housework during my "study time," what my five year old refers to as my "quiet play time," the day probably ain't going to go very well. Somehow I have to jumpstart the dishes and the laundry before 9:00 a.m if anything at all is to be accomplished house-wise that day.

It's annoying. In fact I'm feeling rather irritable about it. But it must be done.

The good news is it's library day, and the reference desk has a book I've requested through Interlibrary loan. And it's a short one.

And this morning, even though I am irritable, I have managed to start the day off right, so there.

Reading: Sometimes I Think It Must Be Done Even When It Proves Frustrating

I'm unprepared to do a lot of writing today, but I have already done a good bit of talking this morning. I don't want to mention names of books or names of authors, so I'll designate one author A, and the other author B.

I was reading a book this morning, one that I have been wrestling with, and I was just beginning to settle in, thinking that the author's analysis was incomplete, but tolerable, when author A hit me with something that really set me off. I repressed the urge to fling the book across the room, and instead took the problem to my kind and brilliant husband. I'm not being sarcastic here; He really is both kind and brilliant.

I read it to him, we discussed it, and I was able to calm down just a bit.

Here's something we noticed: your response to a particular book is often a result of the expectation you bring to your reading of it.

My husband posited that if I reacted so strongly to author A, shouldn't I have responded with equal vehemence to author B.

"No, and here's the difference...." I realized it as I explained.

When I read the book by author B, I went in knowing that I was unlikely to agree with his position. I expected some insight, which he did in fact display, but my trust was never violated by author B because I hadn't invested a significant amount of trust in him in the first place.

Not so with author A. I went into author A's book expecting an agreeable reading experience. I didn't expect to agree with everything she said, but I did expect to find arguments and ideas that I could appreciate. Almost immediately my trust was violated.

Was it violated violently? No. It's just that there seemed to be a certain element missing from her assertions beginning on page one. I'm still not entirely sure what it is that is missing, I just know that I don't trust this person. I still expect her to somehow be able turn it around on me, to redeem this reading experience, but as I said, every time I start to think, hey, this is getting better, she implies something that blows up the entire thing.

Ursula LeGuin in fact first alerted me to this idea of an author violating the reader's trust. It makes sense to me. When you know what to expect from an author and you get that very thing, even if it is a problematic thing, it is acceptable. In fact there are some authors who I find to be a lot of fun to argue with. Though it is perhaps a one-sided exchange, it is a rewarding one. There are others who I don't enjoy arguing with at all. Neither do I enjoy reading them, and author A, it seems, is falling into that category.

I haven't made up my mind about author A. I'm still willing to wait and see if things will change. Maybe I'll find her analysis better on some issues than on others. We all have our strengths and weaknesses. We all have our peculiar emphases and blind spots.

But now I've gotten to a part of author A's book I don't even understand. When Michael becomes available again, we'll talk through it and he'll be able to help me understand.

Unfortunately, based on my analysis above, I may be setting myself up for more frustration, that is, by continuing to hope for an improved reading experience, but it's a chance I'll have to take.

There isn't a lot you can learn by refusing to engage ideas that challenge your thinking.

Thoughts on Teaching My Child to find Shizuoka on a Map

I'm thinking about my children's education a lot these days, trying to learn all I can about learning and teaching, trying to figure out what's what and how to do this Home Education thing. As much as I resisted the idea in the past, I'm starting to see that teaching my boys might be kinda fun, and is totally appropriate for us considering we, my husband and I, are life-long learners ourselves.

Me, I'm curious about just about every subject, from particle physics to spelling, which isn't to say that I understand anything about particle physics, or expect my five year old son to.

We'll be able to model for them how and why to learn. We'll be able to provide ample rime for review so that new information can move easily from short-term memory into long term memory, etc.

Anyway, I was thinking the other night about geography. I bought this awesome DK World Atlas at the Classical Conversations Parent Practicum last week. I fell in love with this thing the very first day of the practicum and I couldn't pass it up. I'd show you a picture of the book, only I don't know how.

The CC people believe a knowledge of geography is important because it makes you more alert to things that are going on in the world. You'll hear the name of a small city in Japan, and think, hey, I know something about that place; I wonder what is going on there. You'll be more alert to the interests and concerns of people you'll never meet. In my own experience, it makes me happy that my five year old son can look at a map of the world, point to Japan, and say, "hey, my uncle David lives there."

This was my brain wave the other night.

What if Parker and I look at a map and I ask him to find Brazil for me. And then Estonia. And then Nepal. Or what if we start out even more simply. We look at a labeled map and I ask him to point to Australia, or Oceania, or whatever it is we're calling that particular continent these day. (The name of the continent has changed recently, or hadn't you heard? I only know about the change by chance.) And then we look for Europe and Asia and Antarctica and all of the seven continents and four oceans. He learned the names of the continents and oceans at VBS last year, so this isn't entirely new information for him. What if we do that regularly over an extended period of time? After a while, he will no longer need to look at the words on the map in order to find the continents or oceans. He'll have memorized their location on the map. And we'll find a map that has a different perspective from time to time, and then he'll see that the locational relationship between the continents stays the same even when their place on the map doesn't. In this way he will no longer be tied to using only one map, but will be able to find Asia on any map.

It all seems so natural, and in the process he and I will learn together what I had already forgotten. I remember memorizing maps in elementary school, but I don't remember what was on them. When someone mentioned North Carolina the other day I realized that even though I know it has a coast, and that it is to the North of the state I live in, which is Alabama, all this time I had been thinking that it was West of us. My mental U.S. map had us traveling through Georgia on the right instead of on the left.

The Last Load of Laundry that Broke the Camel's Back

I had one of those moments Friday night.

It had been a long week. I was behind on almost every aspect of family and household care. There was a week's worth of laundry, dishes to be washed, etc.

You know the song. I've shared it with you before: "He Will Come," recorded by Waterdeep.



"She can handle any tragedy that happens but not little things like this."

I was on the last load of laundry, having congratulated myself on removing three chocolate bars from my son's pants before starting the dryer cycle, as well as the fact that they were still in their wrappers and the clothing remained unstreaked. It was already late by the way that I measure time. Back to the kitchen for more dish washing. Yeah.

And I was so tired.

But what do you know, I didn't get all of the chocolate bars out of my son's pants after all. There was one more. It came out of the dryer, after two dryer cycles, in a ball, having left small chocolate streaks on the clothes and on the walls of the dryer.

I thought the entire load was ruined. You knew that heat tends to set-in stains, didn't you?

I put the load through the washing machine again thinking that every item of clothing in that load had been ruined, and I was devastated. Believe me when I tell you I was devastated over a single load of laundry.

When our car was totaled two years ago, right before our anniversary, I was fine. When my husband lost his job a few weeks later and decided to pursue his own project rather than interview for a new one, I was fine. Two years later, in the present, while still waiting for our income to start covering our expenses, I'm not exactly fine, but I am trusting God to keep us going debt-free as He has all this time. But the laundry? That was it.

You'll tell me that I didn't really come through all those bigger things without paying a high price, and you're right. But when I tell you I was fine, I tell you the truth. The big things, I can trust God for. The little things make me want to quit.

And that's what I was thinking while the laundry ran a second time that night. I'm done. I cannot be in charge of the housework. I cannot do it, Lord. You have given me a job I cannot do.

You have let me down.

We have that kind of relationship, God and I do. I yell at Him sometimes. He lets me rant and rave, and still He knows my heart, and I figure better that I yell at Him than yell at my husband, because He is big and strong, He knows me, and He knows the truth, and honey, He can take it. Besides, He knows exactly what I'm thinking whether I tell Him or not.

The Bible tells me that this is right. David did it. So did Job. And God answered both of them.

I hope you don't think I say this flippantly; it is a serious matter.

And after I've ranted and raved against Him for a while, this is what He says to me.

God says, "Baby, I'm here with you, and you can trust Me." Not in those words, of course. There are no floating voices, as my friend Damon sometimes reminds me. Maybe sometimes God does speak in an audible voice, but never to me.

And you know what? Even if the situation hadn't ultimately worked out it would have been okay. I scrubbed down the inside of the dryer with an SOS pad. I used stain stick on most of the clothes, and when I washed them that second time they came out clean.

And, hey, I got a blog post out of it.

My Week in Review: A Thought-scape

I can hardly believe the extent to which this Practicum deal-eo has worn me out. It was three days in Gardendale, which meant just over an hour's drive each way over the course of three days, and last night after sticking my children in their beds, I was done. This morning I still feel the effects.

So what happened this week?

I spent a lot of money. I drove through heavy rains such that all I could see in front of me was the next car, and the white lines rushing past between us. I learned from the lady sitting behind me in lecture that the best way to teach my three year old beginning reading might be to spend ten to fifteen minutes with him on starfall.com every day. I did this with Parker without intentionality. Isaac has not gotten similar treatment.

I have no expectation of Isaac being an early reader, but right now he seems interested, and we certainly need some little something to do together on a regular basis. I firmly believe that children learn to read at their own pace. Some will latch onto in early; others will drift into it late, and that is okay.

The point is that I don't know about Isaac whether he will learn to read the same way Parker did or not. He may. He may not. This is an opportunity to learn something more about my child, if I can somehow pay attention. What may I learn about each of my children today?

On Wednesday afternoon someone said to always examine your expectations with your children. There are certain things they need to accomplish in the course of the school year. We mean for them to master a few particular skills, and we shouldn't be in a rush to move on to the next things before they master them.

You know this is an issue in my own life. I'm always, and I mean always, in such a hurry to move on to the next book that I often rush through the one I am reading right now. It's as though time were the enemy, and not a good gift from our good God. I'm reading Eugene Peterson right now, who is teaching me at present that time is part of God's good creation.

And I have rambled, but you see the inter-connectivity here. This is one of the things this Classical Conversations curriculum emphasizes, and one of the things I like about it. It is a true description of reality that we have been trained to miss. Math and science are not only related to each other, they are related to literature as well. The book I am reading this morning isn't an isolated work; it is related to a conversation that has been going on since creation. Not only that, but I find that two books I am reading right now, chosen independently, are about the exact same set of ideas discussed in very different ways. One reinforces the other even if only by contrast.

Um, I guess I'd better stop now.

Exposure and Overexposure in the Realm of Ideas

It's Wednesday night. I am so tired. New thought for the day: according to this classical model of education the idea seems to be that three exposures to new material makes it graspable. So does that mean that I should read every book three times? Because one of my great struggles with reading remains: I read a book, I love a book, but a month later I may not be able to tell you what the book was about. I also have a difficult time summarizing content for the sake of discussion, which is a major disadvantage when you want to get a third person's input.

Michael suggests that I should simply take good notes on first reading. He has a point.

I have this notebook I started using for note-taking a while back. I used it for a good while with a certain success. These pages, they were filled from margin to margin with thoughts, extrapolations, quotations. I stopped doing that after a while, but the time has probably come to resume  it.

I'm reading a book right now, a book that frustrates me. I'm not certain the author has engaged her ideas with enough depth. Michael says to me, maybe you need to examine these ideas, do your own research, develop an outline based on this other author's work, and use it as the basis for your own book. Address the problem directly. It's a good idea. Welcome to the rest of my life.

I don't know. Can I develop the mental discipline to do such a thing?

That Old Joke About Making Assumptions--the Clean Version

We went out of town this past weekend. So early Saturday morning I'm in the kitchen washing dishes and I suddenly realize that I forgot to ask my husband whether his parents knew when we were coming. I assumed that when he communicated to me that we were going, he had communicated it to them as well.

An assumption. They tell you never to make them.

Only, usually when you make an assumption, you don't actually think it through. Assumptions go unexamined almost by definition, don't they? It's only after the fact that you realize an assumption has been made, and even then only if your assumption has been proven false.

As it turns out this time he did remember to tell them. True story.

On Levi Weaver and Supporting the Music

Levi Weaver. He came to town last year and played a house show at my friends house right around the corner from me. This was the second live show I had attended in a matter of weeks, after many, many years of a current music-less existence. And this from the girl who used to have a CD going in her room ALL THE TIME.

It was good. He was able to do a lot of sound manipulation right there in my friend's living room, which was cool. He writes his own stuff, which is also cool. Other than a few tracks on grooveshark.com, this was my first exposure to his music.

In some ways I am cautious about devoting myself to new music. Once upon a time my brother made the mistake of saying that I had good taste in music, that I managed to find the good stuff in a sea of mediocrity. It was a mistake because since then I have become paranoid about my own musical taste. Is this one good enough for me to say I like it?

I think so. I like it. I really do. Levi offers his music for free from time to time, so I have gradually been able to access most of it, even with my seriously miniscule music budget. I haven't been able to support his career the way I would prefer to. Levi has a family to provide for, and I affirm that musicians need to be supported for their work as much as any other skilled and talented traditionally employed person does. Otherwise, how can they possibly continue to produce it? And I want so badly for the music to be made.

One of the things I like about Levi is the fact that he is transparent about what he does. Not long ago he was involved in an IndieGoGo campaign for a movie project that would document his life on the road and directly address the difference between success and fame. He spent time on his blog talking about exactly how any money that was raised would be used, which I thought was cool, because I had a lot of questions in that regard.  Preeminent among those was, How are you going to make this work?

Well, I was very happy last week to find that Levi Weaver has addressed some of my questions in two blog posts he has written from the road. The first one, "On David Lowery and Stealing Music," addresses ethical reasons why stealing music is wrong. I freely admit to you my ignorance. I don't know who David Lowery is. I also don't understand how anyone can argue that stealing music does not harm to those producing the music, particularly those who are doing it independently. The Chaffers used to put these clever notices on their CDs, such as "This is an independent record. Unauthorized duplication of this recording means we have trouble putting food on the table, and is also against the law." (don chaffer + waterdeep, 'whole 'nother deal')

He then balances this post with another one that arrived in my reader last week, "Part Two: Why I Believe in Free Music." I'll tell you the truth, this other side of the issue really encouraged me when I read it yesterday. I've wondered how the whole giving-away-your-stuff-freely deal ever translates into revenue. Yes, I am currently emotionally invested in Levi Weaver's success, but I have no money. I am emotionally invested in my friend, John Kelley's success as an artist, but I have no money. Same is true for Greenhorn Gardening. I try to promote these guys as often as I can, but I have only limited access to their intended audience.

And of course I am emotionally invested in the success of Dog Fight: Starship Editon. This is the product that will or will not land food on my own table.

So (I suggest you) read Levi's blog posts. While you're on his website, listen to the music. You can stream it easily and immediately. It's good stuff.

Why Is It So Hard to Really Say What We Mean?

It's difficult in two senses, and I expect these will come up again in a later post, but for now I'll tell you that one of those senses involves a certain fear-factor.

So, guys, I just wrote something that was a little heated, and probably controversial, and I'm not sure I'm ready to expose it to the vast world of the internet just yet. Sometimes the internet really depresses me, because while there are a lot of things that are great about it, it is certainly not a safe and friendly place. My husband would tell me, "If you don't want to get into a fight, then don't publish." The thing is, if you aren't prepared to get into a fight, can you really ever afford to publish anything?

You ask your innocent question on Facebook, and then are shocked when your so-called "friends" don't react as warmly as (or maybe even react more warmly than) you anticipated. I've seen ugly responses to blog posts and YouTube videos. Am I prepared to receive them? Honey, when you tell the truth you have to be prepared. And to tell you the absolute truth, I am not so prepared.

Do I want people to read my blog or don't I? You know guys, sometimes I really don't know the answer to that. What was I writing about this morning? Um, postmodernism. You read that correctly and now I'm embarrassed. Surely postmodernism is safely theoretical? Well no, actually it isn't. It creeps into everything we think and say and do. As does it's predecessor, modernism.

Is this a spiritual issue? Why, yes to that one too. It most certainly is.

So let me just quickly tell you the name of my favorite book on the subject, Who's Afraid of Postmodernism? Taking Derrida, Lyotard, and Foucault to Church by James K.A. Smith. I've recently discovered through other written contexts that I don't necessarily follow Smith's political reasoning, but I love his Christian analysis of postmodernism. Smith is a man who doesn't separate his faith from his study of philosophy, and I believe he manages very well to integrate the two. It's worth reading. I think that Smith demystifies the theory, boils it down to its most basic assumptions, and shows very clearly that at its root postmodernism is not antagonistic to a holistic Christian worldview. In fact, it can be mobilized in favor of kerygmatic theology, as Smith might say. Don't let that big Greek-derived word scare you. It simply refers to the gospel that is preached.

Read it. It's a good book, and much more easily accessible than trying to read Derrida, Lyotard, and Foucault directly.

Wrapping Up a Pretty Decent Week of Writing

I'll save my more intensive blog postings for during the week. Since all of a sudden I've started writing again, and who knows how long it will last, I feel the need to pace myself, and not throw it all at you in one swoop before it disappears. Maybe it (this ability to write) will disappear and maybe it won't. I make no promises.

Highlights of my week:

• Writing again. Suddenly I'm feeling sort of creative, and this is a good feeling.
• Time with friends. We've had a rather social week this week in the Fox household. This is good for me. I even managed to give the toilet a good scrubbing in anticipation of having guests in my home. My children got to have fun with friends too this week.
• I found some more good books that I am now dying to read.
• I think I am in the midst of learning something about putting people ahead of all those practical considerations that are not necessarily life-affirming. 
• I acquired some new houseplants unexpectedly this week. I have hope that I will water them on a regular basis and not half killed them as I have some of my other houseplants.
• I read a good, though sometimes a little threatening, and not wholly unproblematic book called The Feminine Soul, by Janet Davis. In fact, I think that combination often makes for a very good book.

Lowlights?

• I've experienced some discouragement and anxiety this week. What I told Michael earlier is that I feel I am supposed to be operating out of grace and wisdom, but instead I have been operating out of discouragement, and a perceived inability to cope with normal daily life. I tend to feel kind of small and overwhelmed. I don't like being accused of being a perfectionist. I'm not. I want balance. I don't want to be good at everything. I want to be good at a few things. I don't want to run my house like a machine. I want to run it like a refuge. 
• Um, all the baby stuff came back from the friend who had borrowed it, and I had just started to make some progress in weeding unused items out of some of the nooks and crannies of our small house. I haven't been able to figure out what to do with those items yet.
• We spent some money I didn't want to, and did spend some money that I didn't. Often these choices are the right ones, but they still cost me something in terms of a certain mental dissonance.
• The coffee beans I've been grinding are past their prime, but I'm not in a position to throw them away and open a new, unexpired bag just yet. I hope that by the time I do, my other stock will not have already expired. We're coming up on August more quickly than expected.

Yesterday I told my husband, "I need a frozen yogurt, a beer, and a good cup of coffee. Do you have any of those things hidden away in your office somewhere?" I'm afraid for a moment he may have thought I was serious. I really did want those things, but I didn't actually expect him to supply them.

You know what, it kind of helps me to write all this out. So that's cool. Have a good weekend!

Keeping Commitments

I was reading Stephen Covey's classic personal management text, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, a while back. I got a few chapters in, but then had to put the book on hold, as evidenced by the fact that it has sat on my reading shelf for three or four months now (see Goodreads sidebar). Let it be known, I am not currently reading this book, not studying it or anything, but I think it is a very good book, and I will get back to it eventually. Even soon, maybe.

One of the excellent points that Covey makes is that we need to become people who are able to keep our commitments. I know that this is easier for some than it is for others. I find a great desire in myself to make commitments and to keep them, but I still often fall down on the job. Covey says the place to start is with making commitments to yourself. Practice them over an extended period. His is a how-to book after all.

So I had this great idea. I wrote myself up a personal commitments list and posted it right next to my desk. And earlier, last month maybe, I promised to share my list with you. So here goes:

Note: This is a longer list than is perhaps advisable for starters. A friend of ours read the Scripture out in small group one night, and it stuck with me.

Kelly's Commitments (A Checklist)

Behold, I go forward, but He is not there,

And backward, but I cannot perceive Him;

When He acts on the left, I cannot behold Him;

He turns on the right, I cannot see Him.

But He knows the way I take;

When He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold.

Job 23:8-10

• Review calendar and commitments checklist every morning to make sure I don't forget anything that's been scheduled.
• Track temperatures daily for NFP. (I have a chart I track this in.)
• Get up early every morning. Start the day off right by not sleeping through the best part of it.
• Shower at night to facilitate the morning's activities.
• Walk (or pursue some other form of exercise).
• Use leg-extensions as a warm-up before walking (or any other exertion, for that matter).
• Drink plenty of water.
• Read and/or study the Bible.
• Memorize entire book of James.
• Take Vitamins (including multi-vitamin, Ginko Biloba, and B-Complex). (Vitamins are on hold at the moment. Seemed like they were causing some problems.)
• Remember that sugar tastes good, but makes you feel bad. Avoid eating or drinking anything sugary until late in the day.
• Wear makeup and jewelry most days.
• Put clothes and jewelry away at night instead of leaving them out until morning. This includes hair ties.
• Remember that drinking too much alcohol at night makes it difficult to get up early in the morning.
• Actively pursue friendships and take responsibility for maintaining them. Don't rely on Facebook to do this for you.
• Leave kitchen counter, dining room table, and coffee table in the condition you wish to find them in the morning (i.e., reasonably clear and clean).
• Be quick to discipline the children before getting angry with them. By the time I am angry it is already too late to teach them anything good or true. Remember that anger produces fear, not obedience; anger produces rebellion, not steadfastness. Correction is not about retribution or revenge; it is about love. The children must be trained to obey us now, so that they will know how to obey God later.
• Keep up with the book keeping and prepare a quarterly profit/loss statement in April, July, October, and January. Do this so that tax time will be easier next year, and so that we will be better informed in order to make decisions about spending. 
  
  Some of these had fallen by the wayside recently, which is why I include that bit about reviewing the calendar and commitments daily. Actually, this morning I'd forgotten it was time to do a quarterly statement, so this little exercise in posting and revision has helped me in that regard as well.
  
  I think an important thing to remember about a set of commitments like this one is that these are fluid, and at times may require further revision. These are things I plan to do to make my life better, to make things run more smoothly, and to free up head space for other pursuits, and they will not be appropriate for every season in my life. I also believe on principle that it is wrong to enslave oneself to one's list. I've said before on Facebook, and will probably say again and again, that a to-do list, which is all this commitments list really is, is a tool that frees you. Preserve your adaptability. And drink your water.

I Suppose This Needs A Title: Happy Independence Day; Let Us Think About History for a Moment

I'm not much of one to write anything special for the holidays. In fact, the very thought causes me to freeze up. I thought about posting a regular old personal post this morning, but it didn't quite seem appropriate.

Instead, in honor of the Classical Conversations Practicum I shall be attending next week, I offer you this assignment from Leigh Bortins. I thought it was a perfectly lovely idea, because I'm a grammar nerd. I also don't mind telling you that I don't actually remember how to diagram a sentence. I appreciate the teaching link she provided, and I hope to check it out, if I can ever get all my work done. Everything seems to be piling up in the month of July.

Declare and Diagram: the first line of The Declaration of Independence. Reading just that first line makes me want to grab up one of our many copies of The Federalist Papers and set to reading. Yes, the language can sometimes be a little tricky to untangle in the 21st century, but it is rich and beautiful, and begs to be read aloud.

Psst: These are both the same link, so you don't have to click on both of them. You've been warned.

Adventures in Bread Making: The First Major Mind-Slip

I remember reading where Jill Cooper (www.livingonadime.com) said if you make a pie crust every day for a month, you'll become an expert crust maker because you'll make every mistake it is possible to make. I've been making bread daily for about three weeks now using an automatic bread machine, and for the first time this morning I neglected to put the dough hook back in the machine before adding my ingredients. The machine had been sitting for forty minutes before I realized, from another room, that the hook was missing. I then compounded the error by turning the machine off before dumping all of the sodden ingredients into a ceramic bowl. If I had taken the time to look at the machine first I would have seen that there was a pausing option.

Maybe it will turn out okay. The thing that worries me is that I am using a wheat bread recipe, and the wheat cycle just sits there for the first half hour of running, and then it combo mixes and bakes for another four hours (!). Is my yeast, now untimely mixed with warm water, going to go crazy before the mixing cycle begins? I don't know what that half hour of sitting is for, or why the bread rises so much the first time before being pounded down by the second kneading cycle. Some reading on the matter is required. It would be good to know these things, and perhaps one of you can explain them to me, even if only for the sake of my children knowing something about food that may come in handy some day.

Idioms are fun

My husband brought this one up last week, and I believe I have related it before:

I once worked in a lighting store. I had the most fun there either finding the needed parts for the electricians who came in every day or helping the stylish consumer find just the right lampshade for a lamp they already owned. As far as lampshades went, it was fun to find just the right size, shape, and proportion to suit the lines of a shapely lamp.

We had shelves devoted to lampshades, and there was one particular shade that had been there for some time. It had a small card attached to it that proclaimed the shade to be "One of a kind." I took a liking to that lampshade and told my husband, "You know that's code don't you? It means, 'This is one ugly lampshade.'"

I bought it. It looked terrific on a lamp we had inherited from my father-in-law's college days.

But the curious thing about that little card was curious only to me. This, too, I explained to Michael later.

"You know what 'one of a kind' actually means? Think about it. Re-imagined literally wouldn't 'one of a kind' mean that the item so marked is merely one of a particular kind? So basically what they are saying is, 'Hey, look: This is a lampshade!'"

Idioms are fun.